wow, this is such a relief, and so much more LESS STRESS. So i am done with the 2 little children that were causing me so much stress and trouble. When i hurt my wrist I did not have any children, but at the same time i also felt that i still needed to take the kids because i have been paid already- so i owed them ATLEAST one more day of daycare... well today was the last day for me- i went to tell the mother that i would only be taking them for today and then it would have to end, .......... but she told me that she found a FT daycare provider that would be going to her house m-f for the kids and she didnt need me anymore. what a relief that was to have her tell me 1st. now i can put an ad in for 1 child for daycare, along w/ the 2 PT boys that i have. I have been trying to get in touch w/ the 1yr olds parents to tell them i will no longer take him- but they never answer the phone and there is no machine to leave a message-oh well!
ANYWAYS--
so we are going to be camping this weekend and i can't wait! This will be Zander's first camping trip, and i am nervous yet excited to see if he is going to like it. unfortunately it is supposed to rain on a couple days that we go, but i hope the rain can hold out for most of the days. then when we get back we only have a few more days and then it will be Zander's bday & the 4th of July all on the same day. Wow that's alot going on and i still haven't finished w/ my kitchen.... oh yeah- thats another thing we are almost done with remodeling the kitchen, we have a few things left. we have to finish the trim, put the hardware on the doors and paint the dining room walls----- and then down the road i would like to get some curtains for the 2 windows in the kitchen and also something for the walls. and a nice plant stand would be great --- oh yeah, a new garbage can (maybe the wooden ones) then my kitchen would look great---(EXCEPT FOR THE REFRIDGERATOR) that is a whole other story---- lets just say that it didnt fit properly in the spot that it was designed togo in, so we had to put it in another area and it doesn't go well in that spot, but it will do for now until we can fix it and remodel a new area. welll i am going to go finish pakcing for my trip and then go to bed and relax. bye, bye!
Thursday, June 26, 2008
Saturday, June 21, 2008
STRESSING
So I have been watching a handful of children these past couple weeks and i think it has come to an end. I still have the 2 boys that are PT 2x's a week, but I am also watching a 19month old & her 9 week old brother. I also have occasionally watched this little 1yr old boy. Some days are light on kids and others i have had all of them at once. Now i first wanted to only take 2 kids, FT, between ages 1- 4.... and somehow i ended up at this point. Everything about it is so wrong. I shouldn't have this many at one time and i also shouldnt have more then 2 kids under the age of 2 years old. My son isn't even 2 yet- so that mean i should only take 1 more little kid. The 2 boys are fine to have- they are old enough to take care of them self (no diapers, feed themself...) and then there is the others.............
well the little 1yr old, his parents haven't got a clue--- they bounce back & forth to different jobs and this little boys schedule changes all the time... not only that- i have told them over and over again-"i need your schedule 1 full week in advance!" and yet they call me at last minutes notice and some times they will say he is coming one day and then never show up---- and then call and tell me he will be there the next day (a day that they didn't plan for)I think that itis time to get rid of this poor child- due to his parents stupidity.
Then i have the 2 kids; let me tell you... so a long time ago i was friends w/ the mother and we just lost contact w/ each other, well when she was coming back from maternity leave , she asked me to do her a favor and watch the kids until September. I felt guilty (because i was watching the other boys)and I told her yes. She is a great person, but unfortunately i do not beleive in her parenting skills. her litte daughter (the 19month old) is aweful--- she has this screch that will bust your ear drums and she ALWAYS wants her way. she will scream or whine if you even look at her the wrong way, or she throws a fit and yells "NO" until you end up giving in. She also has this thing about hitting when she can't get her way/ or slapping/ kicking.... now i have only had her for 2 weeks and i have seen all of this, she will ignore you when you are speaking to her and she hates to share anything. This type of behavior has afftected the entire household. Zander is miserable andis constinantly getting beat on. He doesn't sleep and i noticed that he started to hit. or if he can't get his way he used to get upset/ maybe cry or throw a tantrum (what i thought was a fit)- but the other day he completely flipped out - i have never seen that before and i know it is because he see's her do it. i will not hit or spank another child so the only thing i can do to her is explain to her why she shouldnt do what she is doing and put her in the play pen. I have seen the mother talk to her and try to correct her--- let me tell you, it sounds like she is trying to read her a story or something- she is so gentle and lets her just run all over the place and have her way- the girl doesn't listen and the mom just lets it go- she says if you ignore it then the kids will stop because they aren't getting the attention for doing something wrong....(yea, ok.. whatever!)i also have told her mother all of the things she is doing w/ me and she said that they have talked to her ( the daughter) about this----i'm sorry but what good does it do to talk to your 19month old about how bad she is---why don't you learn to discpline her when she is doing it----- i dont know, maybe have a stern voice when you scold her or even smack her on the bottom (i am not a beater, but sometimes i think a smack on a kids butt or hands may just work---- i never got beat, but i sure got spanked and i learned my lesson) and then theres the baby 9 weeks old--- i know he is just an infant, but he is cinstinantly crying--- he has the typical cry for food or dirty diaper and stuff like that, but he also cries because he wants to be held all the time. at first i thought nothing of it because i asked if he is held all the time and was told "no". but i soon found out that is not true--- he is always held and he sleeps with mom in her bed--- all night, she told me that if he cries at night, then noone will get sleep and they won't be able to work....but you are making it so much more worse for everyone else that has your child for 9 1/2 hours a day, 5 days a week! let your kid just cry and he will soon learn. this little guy is going to end up just like his sister. it is so hard to take care of an infant that always wants your attention and a crazy 2year old, plus my own child that wants to copy the crazy girl and the older kids.
i have been so stressed out over this that i can't sleep, and my virtigo has kicked in so bad, w/ tenson headaches constinantly. This has to change- i should just do what i originally said and only take 1-2 kids. Since i am keeping the 2 PT boys i only want 1 more child to watch... i'll even take one PT w/ set days. i am letting my emotions get in the way when i took on the kids and look where it got me... i wanted to help all these parents and they can'tr help me- so now i have to piss them off and tell them i cannot take their kids anymore.
on top of everything- i sprained my wrist or did something to it the other day and the orthepedic surgeon said that i should be taking any kids for the next 2 weeks- to let it heal. well that sucks.
but anyways----- there is my vent for today----my head just wont stop hurting, hopefully in the next few days i will relax with NO kids!
hey-- did everyone check out my scrapblog website... look at the blog that i wrote prior to this and it is on that!
well the little 1yr old, his parents haven't got a clue--- they bounce back & forth to different jobs and this little boys schedule changes all the time... not only that- i have told them over and over again-"i need your schedule 1 full week in advance!" and yet they call me at last minutes notice and some times they will say he is coming one day and then never show up---- and then call and tell me he will be there the next day (a day that they didn't plan for)I think that itis time to get rid of this poor child- due to his parents stupidity.
Then i have the 2 kids; let me tell you... so a long time ago i was friends w/ the mother and we just lost contact w/ each other, well when she was coming back from maternity leave , she asked me to do her a favor and watch the kids until September. I felt guilty (because i was watching the other boys)and I told her yes. She is a great person, but unfortunately i do not beleive in her parenting skills. her litte daughter (the 19month old) is aweful--- she has this screch that will bust your ear drums and she ALWAYS wants her way. she will scream or whine if you even look at her the wrong way, or she throws a fit and yells "NO" until you end up giving in. She also has this thing about hitting when she can't get her way/ or slapping/ kicking.... now i have only had her for 2 weeks and i have seen all of this, she will ignore you when you are speaking to her and she hates to share anything. This type of behavior has afftected the entire household. Zander is miserable andis constinantly getting beat on. He doesn't sleep and i noticed that he started to hit. or if he can't get his way he used to get upset/ maybe cry or throw a tantrum (what i thought was a fit)- but the other day he completely flipped out - i have never seen that before and i know it is because he see's her do it. i will not hit or spank another child so the only thing i can do to her is explain to her why she shouldnt do what she is doing and put her in the play pen. I have seen the mother talk to her and try to correct her--- let me tell you, it sounds like she is trying to read her a story or something- she is so gentle and lets her just run all over the place and have her way- the girl doesn't listen and the mom just lets it go- she says if you ignore it then the kids will stop because they aren't getting the attention for doing something wrong....(yea, ok.. whatever!)i also have told her mother all of the things she is doing w/ me and she said that they have talked to her ( the daughter) about this----i'm sorry but what good does it do to talk to your 19month old about how bad she is---why don't you learn to discpline her when she is doing it----- i dont know, maybe have a stern voice when you scold her or even smack her on the bottom (i am not a beater, but sometimes i think a smack on a kids butt or hands may just work---- i never got beat, but i sure got spanked and i learned my lesson) and then theres the baby 9 weeks old--- i know he is just an infant, but he is cinstinantly crying--- he has the typical cry for food or dirty diaper and stuff like that, but he also cries because he wants to be held all the time. at first i thought nothing of it because i asked if he is held all the time and was told "no". but i soon found out that is not true--- he is always held and he sleeps with mom in her bed--- all night, she told me that if he cries at night, then noone will get sleep and they won't be able to work....but you are making it so much more worse for everyone else that has your child for 9 1/2 hours a day, 5 days a week! let your kid just cry and he will soon learn. this little guy is going to end up just like his sister. it is so hard to take care of an infant that always wants your attention and a crazy 2year old, plus my own child that wants to copy the crazy girl and the older kids.
i have been so stressed out over this that i can't sleep, and my virtigo has kicked in so bad, w/ tenson headaches constinantly. This has to change- i should just do what i originally said and only take 1-2 kids. Since i am keeping the 2 PT boys i only want 1 more child to watch... i'll even take one PT w/ set days. i am letting my emotions get in the way when i took on the kids and look where it got me... i wanted to help all these parents and they can'tr help me- so now i have to piss them off and tell them i cannot take their kids anymore.
on top of everything- i sprained my wrist or did something to it the other day and the orthepedic surgeon said that i should be taking any kids for the next 2 weeks- to let it heal. well that sucks.
but anyways----- there is my vent for today----my head just wont stop hurting, hopefully in the next few days i will relax with NO kids!
hey-- did everyone check out my scrapblog website... look at the blog that i wrote prior to this and it is on that!
Monday, June 16, 2008
Saturday, June 7, 2008
Relay For Life
Wow- Amazing, so last night I went to the Relay for Life event in Green Island. I did not stay the entire night but i left around 10pm---after the luminaries. OMG--- that was amazing... it was so emotional, i could not stop crying. when they started to put the bags around the track to prepare for the lighting, i was walking the track with Alexzander and so him and i started to read each bag---- as we were walking they asked for everyone to clear the track and only have the "caregivers" take 1 lap around--- these are the forgotten ones when some one is going through this tragedy---these are the people who help you get through. Zander & i respected them enough to step aside and wait until they took that lap and we honored them----as we finished our 1st lap around w/ the bags out- i just broke down, it was so sad and heartbreaking to read what some people had wrote on there bags. i saw the ones that we made in honor of my mother and a few others in our life... that is when i completely lost it-----WOW
then later on when it started to get dark- they put lights in the bags and they had all the survivors surround the track--- a torch was lit and each individual survivor walked it to another (it was completely quiet and very slow and soothing music was playing) i watched as the torch was passed from one to the next and i cried the entire time. this is to honor all the ones who have passed on from cancer and for those who have survived it. my cousin Fred was one of the survivors on the track. let me just tell you---- i am still emotional about it, just writing this i am crying all over again. i love raising $$ for a great cause, and i would love to participate in walks and events--- but this one took a little piece of my emotions and brought it to the surface. I don't know if i can do it again (maybe it get easier as the years go by), i would defiantly raise funds again, but i may just stay home the next time or maybe not.
Maybe i still need grieving time for my mother, I'm not sure. i thought i was almost prepared for her death---we saw it coming (i know, you're never 100% prepared for someone to die) but, i handled it very well. i don't remember crying to much, but the more that i think about things, and different events happen in my life the past year---- the more i start to cry and when i do i think of my mother. maybe this is my way of grieving for her and also giving back----besides she keeps popping up in my dreams at night (it's kinda creepy)
anyways, after the luminaries i hung out for a bit longer and walked the track some and then i decided it was time to head home. my cousin Melissa and her friends were kind enough to walk me to my car- as i was driving away it was very quiet for me and i had a few moments to just sit back and take it all in. that was so healing for me and i wish that my brothers and sister were there. i think that it would have been good for them also.
Well all i know is that I have already raised $100 for American Cancer Soiety and I would still ike to raise more for the year- I have until Aug 31st to get more funds in there- and then i will start again for next year. This is the site you can go to if you would like to donate---- http://main.acsevents.org/goto/hhayden
Thanks!
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